Ok, so there is this thing about me that I hate…I take things so personal sometimes. I take things to heart, so much that it hurts my insides…do you know what I’m talking about???
…anyway, the thing about that is, I hate that I feel like that. It’s like I have no control over how people respond to me, or treat me, so most of the time, I take their frustrations or confusion, and point the blame at myself because I don’t want them to be upset…
…I don’t want them to feel pain, sorrow or uncertainty, so it’s like this innate thing inside me that says, ‘feel it for them’.
Now I don’t know if you would consider that a ‘People Pleaser’, which can be such a harsh label that people throw around, but I do wish to work on this attribute that I so wish I did NOT have…
People…beautiful, yet so amazingly uncertain…
3 comments:
Hey Emily, I can't say that I've ever been a people pleaser but I know a teen girl who goes to Riley that is feels under pressure by people all the time. She worry so much about what other people might think of her that she too tries to feel pain for them on behalf of her, so she pinches herself, pulls her arm hairs out, pulls her eyelashes out and even cuts herself when no one is looking. It's madness. I wonder what some people do to the insides of themselves when they are worried about the impressions they've left on others.
Even I've beat myself up with my own words and conclusions, like punching my heart over and over when I regret an encounter with someone that I've had I thought didn't go well. I think God hates this. I think we need to worship Him and not bow to our feelings and pleasings.
Emily,
I am "hard wired" the same way...and I'm a 50 yr old business owner..don't think that hasn't been challenging some times. God has given you a tender heart, a heart of mercy and compassion. Sometimes it feels like a curse...feeling so sensive, but you know, I also pick up on things in other people most people are obvious to...it's a package deal. It says in 1 Peter... a gentle and quiet spirit in God's sight is very precious..You have that, embrace it, life WILL gradually "toughen you up" just a little in this regard, but in the end I would encourage you to embrace this sensitivity as a slice of God's heart he's placed in you, his child
Thank you DM! Your words mean more to me than I can say! Bless you ...
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